..and you know it.

hope is a strange thing; a currency for people who know they’re losing.
the more familiar you are with hope, the less beautiful it becomes.

-16 years of Alcohol

i think too highly of people. naive as it may sound, i don’t think assholes are just assholes. i want to believe that somewhere inside that person is a conscience, a genuine compassionate soul, a heart. i wanted to believe that assholes are assholes because they lack strength. the strength to come clean,to admit that they are wrong, that they’ve done others wrong.

i am an asshole and i do have a conscience. i did what i did because i had to. it’s self-preservation, you see? i needed to hold on to the small amount of self-respect i have left. i am coming clean and you know i haven’t done you wrong.

i’m done hoping, i’m done losing.

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